Voldie and Wormtail looking to become stars!
by jamie2006
Summary: Voldemort and Wormtail have decided they want to be on TV and give up their bad habits as dark wizards... But will that be so easy to do I mean this is Voldemort we are talking about!


It was day one of American Idol auditions and Voldemort and Wormtail were the very first people in line to try out. They had stood in line two days before the audition just so they could be first while the judges were in a good mood. Voldemort stood proudly as they handed him his number and told him to stick it on his chest. Wormtail was not as exited but still seemed to like that he was going to get a piece of paper with a number on it. "Well this is it Wormtail we are about to be known for something more than evil wizards." Voldemort said to Wormtail as they walked upstairs. 

"Of course sir." Wormtail answered as they were entering the lobby where they would wait for the judges to arrive. They waited for about thirty minutes and the judges arrived and Ryan Seacrest called them over and told them to go in. 

"Hey Dawg!" Randy said as Voldemort walked in with Wormtail behind him. Simon just sat there laughing his head off. 

"I'm not a dog! I am the most powerful dark wizard in the whole world!" Voldemort said as he pulled out his wand and pointed it at them.

"Sure you are and I am Mary Frickin Poppins!" Simon said while Paula sat there with her head buried behind a piece of paper laughing. 

"Wormtail! Who is Mary Frickin Poppins?" Voldemort asked.

"I believe she is a children's character from a happy man named Disnoo!" Wormtail answered.

"Ok, let's just get on with it! What are your names?" Paula asked.

"Well I am Peter Petigrew or Wormtail as some people call me, and this is my friend Voldie!"

"WORMTAIL! Don't call me by my nickname on TV ever again or you will suffer the consequences!" Voldemort said in a complete rage!

"I'm so sorry your lord!" Wormtail responded.

"Ok so Voldie, what are you going to sing for us today?" Randy asked

"Wormtail and I are going to sing Voldie girl!" -Laughter from all of the judges

"- Hi Voldie- Hi Wormtail- You wanna go for a ride? - Sure, Wormtail - Jump in! - Ha ha ha ha! I'm a Voldie girl in the Voldie world Life in plastic, it's fantastic You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere Imagination, life is your creation Come on, Voldie, let's go party I'm a Voldie girl in the Voldie world Life in plastic, it's fantastic You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere Imagination, life is your creation 

SILENCE IN THE ROOM EXCEPT FOR THE JUDGES LAUGHTER!

"What the hell was that?!" Simon exclaimed

"You didn't like it?" Voldemort asked Simon

Everyone starts laughing

"No I didn't like it, I thought it was utterly atrocious" Simon responded while Randy and Paula had their heads turned.

"Well I will sing another song then without my friend here!"

"NO!" The judges screamed

"CRUIO" Voldemort yelled as he pointed his wand toward a security man coming towards him. "Now listen to me sing or I will do the same to you!" 

"Touch my bodyPut me on the floorWrestle me aroundPlay with me some moreTouch my bodyThrow me on the bedI just wanna make you feelLike you never did.Touch my bodyLet me wrap my thighsAll around your waistJust a little tasteTouch my bodyKnow you love my curvesCome on and give me what I deserveAnd touch my body.Boy you can put me on youLike a brand new white teeI'll hug your body tighterThan my favorite jeansI want you to caress meLike a tropical breezeAnd float away with youIn the Caribbean Sea"

"So was that better?" Voldemort asked.

"Dawg, Dawg, no dawg!" Randy said as he tried to hold back the laughter

"Wow that first performance was bad and that one was worse" Simon said

"Honey, you have an amazing talent it is just not singing, go be a great dark wizard! Or try your luck on Dancing with the stars! 

"Avade Kedavra"

"Avade Kedavra"

"Avade Kedavra"

Voldemort screamed three times as he pointed his wand to each judge and watched them die! Voldemort and Wormtail then walked out the door where Ryan Seacrest was standing. "Hey you wanna go out tonight, I dig bald blue guys!" Ryan asked Voldemort. With that said, Voldemort and Wormtail walked out of their building to the airport to board a plane for Los-Angeles to be on Dancing with the stars.


End file.
